I was asked a question recently, the kind of question that comes up in the Learning Community (open for new members now!), about how to follow up with potential clients.
“My potential client is dealing with a cancer diagnosis. And they had already said that my work was really helpful and wanted more, but I haven’t heard from them. The last thing I want to be is pushy. Can I, how do I, check in with them?”
This is such an important question, because the complexity of the situation is common, and the tangle of needs/desires in the business owner is also really common. For the business owner, they want new clients, they want this person to get the help and support they need, and they also want to honor the connection there, and not just drop them.
Equally complex is the overwhelm both logistically and emotionally of a new cancer diagnosis, the challenge of juggling treatment questions and what is supportive. And just exhaustion that comes with it.
It’s complex. Just sitting with, and honoring, the complexity is so important. This is perhaps the most important step.
Often with complexity, different needs, feelings, desires all feel like they are in competition with each other. And very often, trauma or other reactions cause one of them to feel the most urgent, and that’s the one that gets acted on. Sometimes that means backing away, shrinking, not reach out. Sometimes it means reaching out, but inappropriately. And everything in between.
Let me tell you something I’ve said at least 1000 times over the years.
Nearly every marketing or sales challenge can be solved with honesty. The honest truth is that it’s complex, and that the various needs and desires and emotions all deserve care.
I recommended that they reach out to their potential client honestly, with nuance, expressing all of it as concisely as possible.
“I struggled with whether to reach out to you, knowing you’re probably overwhelmed, but also knowing you got relief from our work together and wanted more. The last thing I want to do is have you feel any pressure from me, or to contribute to any overwhelm you’re feeling in any way.
“I just want you to know that I’m here, if you want support. Or, if you don’t want support yet, but want me to check back in with you in a few weeks or a month, I’m happy to do that, too.
“I’m here cheering you on, wanting the best for you. If you can, I’d love to hear from you, how you’re doing, and if I can be a support.”
One of the more hidden parts of all of this.
It’s not uncommon for our clients to feel guilty about getting paid for helping people. That somehow reaching out and support folks to work with them is being pushy in order to take money from them.
Please, as much as you can, be kind and gentle with yourself here. Your clients are adults, they know that you get paid. Even if you work with children, the people paying you are adults, and they get it.
If you’re sincere, if your heart is in the right place, they can feel the care that you have. They know you aren’t doing it just to get paid, and they are okay with you being supported, too. It’s a mutuality of care.
Honesty and nuance wins the day.
Your potential clients understand the nuance as much as you do! And they need help like everyone else.
If you’re facing a situation like this, let yourself list out all the factors that make up the complexity and nuance in the situation. Notice how it all feels in your heart.
Then, write as brief an email as possible, touching on the different nuances and complexities, and reach out.
Does this help? Have you done this, or have questions? How have you worded the nuance and complexity in these situations?
With love,
Mark Silver, M.Div.
Heart of Business, Inc.
Every act of business can be an act of love.
Get help with challenging, nuanced situations in your business.
Our Learning Community opens twice per year for open enrollment, and right now we’re in one of those times. Compassionate Accountability, live coaching, deep heart check-ins, Virtual Retreats, dozens of learning modules…
There’s so much here to help you develop a thriving, sustainable business. All priced at pay from the heart.
And yes, the next Virtual Retreat is this Friday, August 19. You get in on it just be joining. Plus, there will be a live deepening class on creating compelling content happening August 30, September 6 and 13.
Join us?
